Saturday, June 30, 2012

Blocked by @PeterLaBarbera: How gay romances really end

P128

I knew it wouldn't work. It couldn't last. He called me jaundiced. I knew he was a bigot. But still...his pursuit of me, his flirtations, the steamy love tweets. Am I not human? If you're a prick to me, do I not bleed?

Pete, I think you touched something deep inside me. And now I can't tell you how I feel. Oh sure, your poisoned mind and hateful rhetoric turned me on a little, but I have to be faithful to my earlier assessment. This--you and me--wouldn't have worked, no matter how badly you wanted it. You did the right thing by blocking me. It's better for us all.

Adieu mon frère, mon ami, mon presque amour....

Posted via email from toddx's posterous

Blubberella: Best movie description ever

Giraffe hug

Giraffes are so cool.

The sweet beginnings of @PeterLaBarbera's crush on me

P110

We met on Twitter. We discussed the pro- and anti-LGBT politics of psycho-social research. He said I looked jaundiced. Apparently, he likes yellow. And gay guys. Because now he's following me. And we all know what that means....

I'm not playing hard to get, Pete. It's not you, it's me. You see, we're just too different. It can never happen. Your followers would hate me. Your family would shun us. We're doomed.

Move on, Pete. I'm too hot to handle. Tweet me once a in a while if you must, and I'll tweet back. But I'm just being nice, so don't read too much into it.

XOXO

Posted via email from toddx's posterous

Is this a come-on from @PeterLaBarbera?

RT @PeterLaBarbera: .@toddx And perhaps not: it is a blessing to see another side presented other than your jaundiced (mostly gay-authored) LGBT junk science.

Posted via email from toddx's posterous

Sunday, June 24, 2012

In honor of Pride, here's a Grindr-friendly map of San Francisco

P76

Now, I won't vouch for its accuracy (ok, it's pretty much right on). Nevertheless, caveat explorer. Enter these zones at your own risk. And play safe.

Posted via email from toddx's posterous

Friday, June 22, 2012

My latest entry for Urban Dictionary: Prophylactic Reservation

I'm basically Webster. Or Merriam.

"Thanks for your definition of Prophylactic reservation!

 

Editors reviewed your entry and have decided to publish it on urbandictionary.com.

 

It should appear on this page in the next few days:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Prophylactic%20reservation

Urban Dictionary"


-----


The term: Prophylactic reservation


The definition: A restaurant reservation made as a backup plan when dining with friends with questionable taste.


Example: My friend Sam made dinner plans for us tonight, but I booked a prophylactic reservation at Nopa just in case he chose Denny's.

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Diane Ackerman on our technology-induced sensory "underload"

"The further we distance ourselves from the spell of the present, explored by our senses, the harder it will be to understand and protect nature’s precarious balance, let alone the balance of our own human nature."

Now, go read the rest of the article.

Posted via email from toddx's posterous

Monday, June 4, 2012

In a cost-cutting move, the US replaces drones with cat helicopters

According to unnamed sources, Taxidermy giant, BechtelPets, has seen a massive increase in orders for its new line of stealth heli-pets. "No one expects to see Fido or Garfield flying by. Those 5 seconds of confusion are just enough for us to complete our missions," said General Smitherton.

PETA could not be reached for comment.

Posted via email from toddx's posterous

Sunday, June 3, 2012

My Home Planet

 

Behold Planet Tea! Oceans of tea, mountains of ice, and the most beautiful glassware in the galaxy.

Ok, this is actually just tea viewed under a microscope. Go here to see four other common drinks in all their microscopic glory.

Yes, that's what you've been drinking all these years.

Friday, June 1, 2012

Tonight's wine (in my dreams)


Taken at City of Healdsburg

Posted via email from toddx's posterous

I am a Child of God

Look, I have the email to prove it. I'm TOTALLY sending this guy some money.
Greetings, Child of God,

As the earth remains there must be seed time and harvest time. A time to sow and the time to reap that which is sown.And the bible said that what ever that a man sow the same he will reap.In tams of sowing seeds the ground where we sow our seed maters.there are virgin lands that has not been sown before,there are fertile land that bring good fruits, there are barren lands that has been over sown there is no more manure to bring forth fruits.

I am Pastor Samuel Ezekwesili, the best Bible commentator in the world presently,the serving Overseer of The Triumphant People Assembly Incorporation. I am putting up a network outreach that will cost over $5.million dollars for a start.

Our vision Is to reach out to those millions of souls out there who has no time to read their Bible.by running commentary on the whole Bible on tape,Cd's, V.c.D,books all for free so that no one will miss out,on our T.V station on daily bases.

Our Mission is to teach and preach the sweet and bitter truth of the word of God which is Christ Jesus no matter what it's cost through out the whole earth as God permits.

Our purpose is Glorify God by making fruitful disciples, to make sure many come to the knowledge of the truth and to reach out to the less privilege,to accomplish this task God has called me to do I want to do you a favor by asking you to be partner with (me) us.

Sow a seed today in this virgin land for hundredfold increase.I ask you to sow with any amount let somethingleaves your hand and ask GOD for three thing that you want God to do for you withing three months,I don't care who you are or what may be your need all i care is what the word of God says with God all things are possible and to them that believe noting shall be impossible,do you believe?every body has need your need.sow a seed today and watch the three things you ask that is very important in your life come to pass,you have noting to lose give it a try He is a God that stand behind His Word to make it come to pass.

Do you know that you will be in Heaven? Do you know that you are a child of God? Do you know that a righteous man is that parson that live his live according to God standard? Do you know that the happiest people in this life are those who invest in others? Do you know that the best tithe you can give to God is to give that parson who has need around you? Do you know that the secret to wealth is to sow in the things of God? do you know that the only religion God recognized is to help the poor, visit the fatherless, the widow and to reach out to the less prevailed and do justice to strangers around you?

Remember the Law of increase is giving, the bible says that He that waters will be watered,give it shall be given unto you,good measure press down,shaking together and running over shall men give unto your bosom the measure you give is what will be measured back to you.He that sow bountifully shall reap bountifully, and He that sow sparingly shall reap sparingly.

The first Hundred people to sow seed into this Ministry their name will be written as the pioneers of this great ministry and their name will be written with Gold.

send money by money gram or western union money transfer to; Samuel Ezekwesili. city Lagos, Nigeria. send MTC number to me. God Bless you as you Obey. Pastor Samuel Ezekwesili.