Monday, October 31, 2011

You look fine

My mirror never says this.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Adam and Eve is a very confusing story

If you give it any thought, that is.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Divide the land like wealth: Visualize Occupy Wall Street

I cannot live in Texas.

Child-proofing

Try harder.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Want: The Poems of Suzanne Somers

It will go perfectly with my collection of Leonard Nimoy's poetry.

I think I'm drinking too much Listerine in the morning

I just bought a bottle a few weeks ago and it's nearly gone. I just drink an ounce or two each morning to ward off the morning breath spirits, but clearly I'm doing something wrong. Does anyone else have this problem?

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Post-It Watches = Brilliant!

Where can I get these? They're the perfect reminder. Have an appointment at 2pm? Write it on a Post-It watch, put it on, and never forget. Alas, the French get everything cool.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Books: Weirdest Moby Dick cover ever

I don't remember them being so well dressed. Or playing football. Or being white school children. Weird, right?

Check out more covers in this NYTimes slideshow. Which is your fave? And where's Queequeg?!

Congress, or The Fox in the Hen House

Why worry? They've got you covered.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Monday, October 17, 2011

Bay Bridge Buck


Taken at Jasper's Corner Tap & Kitchen

Posted via email from toddx's posterous

If you can milk a pigeon, can you make cheese from it?

Media_httpidailymailc_dtwel

The journal BMC Genomics recently published an article about avian "milk." Please note the quotation marks. It's milk-like. They're hesitant to just call it milk. Because it comes from birds and we like to distinguish ourselves from birds because we have hair and produce milk. Well, some of us do. I personally don't.

Regardless of the inter-species rivalry, the opportunities for avian "milk" exploitation are endless. Pigeon Parmesan sounds delicious, right? From Bird Brie to Molting Manchego, I think avian cheese is the next big thing. Sell all your gold and invest today!

Posted via email from toddx's posterous

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Gay Titanic couple found

Forget Kate and Leo. Make a movie about these two! And, yes, the Weekly World News is completely reputable.

Pancakes for pillows

But what do I use for syrup? Check out these culinary cushions here.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Christianity vs. Everyone Else

Dear readers,

Are you feeling the love? Because I'm not. If this is honestly how Christians see the world (or at least California), then how do we even begin to find common ground? Should we even try?

Sincerely,
Militant Homosexual Californian Atheist member of the ACLU (aka their living nightmare).

P.S. Does anyone else think the gay guy's hand is a "little" too close to Christ's special place?

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Art, but better

See, censorship works. This painting has never looked better. I recommend adding these black bars to all sorts of so-called works of art. If I may be so bold, I would even recommend them for certain people. Seriously, no one wants to see what's passing for fashion in many parts of the world these days. And don't even get me started about your shoes. Well, not YOUR shoes. My readers are "haute to trot."

The rest of you? COVER IT UP!